Happy Halloween

Halloween is here. Yippee!!!! I wish I was still young enough to go trick or treating. At least I have Spidey, where I can steal all the chocolate. I have to be careful though now as he is old enough to voice his opinion wether or not I steal his candy. All the other years he was too young to have all that candy so Ironman and I ate it. Now he can hoard it.

We are all dressing up this year. Spidey is The Thing, from fantastic 4. Ironman is dressing up as some other comic book character. Aren't I bad, my poor hubby has been working on his costume for days and I can't even remember the name of it. Tells ya how much I care about comic books. I am an escaped convict from Ferndale Institution. I wore my costume on Friday night and it went over quite well. I should have put a little more effort into it but it works.

Nat and Coby are coming out here to trick or treat. We live in a pretty good area I think. All the houses are close together so it is easier on the little legs. Nat is going to dress up in one of our costumes from last year. I think she is going to be the blow up ballerina, and Coby will be a giraffe. I can't wait.

I want to go back to Mexico

Mexico was a blast. I soooo want to go back. We got awesome tans and met a whole bunch of great people. I even met a realtor/mortgage broker that lives in Calgary, so he could come in very handy.

The only thing that really sucked about Mexico is my fckn skin. Of course I didn't take any cream with me, so I was so uncomfortable by the last day all I wanted to do is get home. The flight home wasn't so great, between my excema, Auntie Flo coming to visit me and my foot feeling like it was going to fall off, what else could have gone wrong.

Me and Nat got tattys in Mexico. People are asking me why I did such a crazy thing when you can't even drink the water down there. Well we did and Nat's looks awesome. Because of my excema going so crazy my skin rejected the ink so mine looks like a big pile of pooh. At least it is not infected. The tattoo guy beside my work was really worried about it when I first showed him. But now that all the scab is off it looks ok, besides the colour being all weird. I will definately have that fixed by next summer.


I really can't wait till I go on a vacation like that with Ironman. He so want's to go, and now that I know what it is like, I can't wait to go somewhere else.

Hammy is FOUND

We found HAMMY!!!!! Yippeee! Last night Iromman was going into the kitchen while he was talking to me. As he walked into the kitchen out of the corner of my eye, I saw a white fluff ball. I yelled, its hammy, and Ironman didn't believe me. I told him to pull the dishwasher out cause that is where it went. Unknown to me the dishwasher can't come out, it's bolted in, but Ironman got down and said there was no way he would fit under there cause the hole was tooo smaalll. I know the holes that mice can fit in and hammy is just like a mouse so I disagreed. I got down and took the front plate of the dishwasher off, and there he was, but we couldn't get him. Ironman said he looked realllly injured. Shit, did I feel bad.

We put some food down, and waited, and waited and waited. Hammy finally came out so I picked him up and put him in the cage. He's not injured but pretty shaken up. Poor little guy. I will always remember to put hammy back in the cage.

We LOST hammy!!!

I got a hamster for my son about a month ago. He's a pretty cute little guy with the HUGEST set of balls I have ever seen on a rodent. He's really soft and adorable. Spidey named him Jude, but we mostly call him hammy or ratty.

The other night Ironman decided little hammy's wheel needed some oiling (it was pretty squeeky) he took hammy out and put him on the couch with me then oiled Hammys wheel with some Pam. I payed a little attention to Hammy and then he went off and did his own thing and since I didn't take him out of the cage, I forgot to but him back. I got up and went to bed, wasn't till the next morning when Spidey told me Hammy wasn't in his cage that I realized what had happened.

OH POOR HAMMY!!!!!! I feel absolutely horrible considering we have not 1, not 2 but 3 CATS!!!
OH POOR HAMMY!!!!!!!!

Internal Dialogue Audit

In my reading with Dr. Phil today, the book has me doing an internal dialogue audit. It's basically an audit of myself and my body and how I view it. So here goes nothing.....


appearance: my general appearance is just ok, I know I am not the ugliest crack head beast on the planet that I see every day at work, but I am definately far from great.


body shape: I way too much resemble a round ball. My stomache has to be my biggest uck. It's just ewww. I suppose my pregnancy and c-section didn't help that, but I find it my biggest problem area. Next would come the triceps, they are just flappy, and wave "HI" to everyone. That is just gross. My legs really need some work as well. I have been embarrassed to wear shorts the past couple of summers. My bro in law asked my this year, why I never wear shorts. That is hard to tell people when they have never had a weight problem. The one thing I can say about my body shape is my ass in not half bad. It's not great by any means, but I would expect alot worse, and have seen alot worse of people my weight. 220lbs It honestly took me a few minutes to realize who I was looking at in a picture when I saw it, it was a pic of a person from behind. It was me and my ass was wayyyy smaller then I thought it was. I guess that is a good thing but still have so long to go.


ability to manage weight: I have NONE, if I did would I be reading this book, I definately would not be 220lbs. That is for damn sure.

self control: don't seem to have any of that either.

exercise level: I know I try to exercise, but I could definately be doing more and putting more of an effort into it. I am way too inconsistent with what I am doing. I have the tools, with the amount that I have slowly collected, I should be in awesome shape, but you need to actually use them. They don't do you any good sitting in the basement looking pretty.


general health: My general health is ok for the moment, but I can see if I don't start taking care of myself now, I will just get worse and worse and either die of lung cancer or obesity or diabetes. I know these are all a possibility and I dont' want to go there. I want to be healthy for my son, and be there for him. And set an awesome example between me and Ironman, I never had any examples like that in my life and I wish that I had, maybe, just maybe I wouldn't be in this position today.

sleep whats that???????

Man oh, man, I have now been up for something like 29 hrs, no nap included. What were we thinking. It was a last minute thing, that we probably shouldn't have done but we did, and even though I have had no sleep, I am glad we did. Everytime we do, it gets us talking and we always feel good about what we have talked about. It relaxes me, sort of, and we talk, talk, talk.

I do like it, but sooooo glad we don't do it all the time. We talked about soooo much stuff last night. Family, how we are going to start helping ourselves more, Nat, Mexico, Spidey. You name it, we talked about it. I really think that it helps Ironman, otherwise he doesn't usually open up to me and let everything out. I like it that we feel that we can say anything to eachother at that time and neither of us take offense to it, because we know we are just trying to thin out the air. That's good for everyone every now and again. I'm glad we did it, but i'm also glad we only do it every once in awhile.

Meanwhile, Ironman is now in the bedroom sleeping and I am looking after not only Spidey but a little 2yr old friend of his, that has the capibility to be a demon. On no sleep. Am I a crazy fool or what? Only 3.45 more hours and I can go wake Ironman.

Dr. Phil

Well I have decided to read Dr. Phil's book, The Ultimate Weight Solution, The 7 keys to Weight Loss Freedom. Anything that I am going to need to write down, I will be posting in here. That way I don't lose it, and it is out there for every one to see.


From the charts I have read I should be anywhere from 112lbs to 143lbs. At this moment I can only dream of getting to 143lbs. I don't even know how long ago that I was there.


My goal right now is to lose 70lbs, that would put me at 150lbs. I must start eating better, more fruits and vegetables and workout at least 4 times a week.

When I lose weight, I want to feel good about myself. I want to feel healthy, I want to look good, I want show a good example for my family.


I have actually had the Dr. Phil book for awhile and thought I had read it. But decided to sit down and read it again. And this time I am actually going to put a little bit of effort into it. I really need to do this for myself to feel better. It may help me out of the depression, but most of all I need set an example for my family. Show them that I won't always be fat.

Two day old alcohol

Work really sucked today. I sometimes wonder if they put that glass up there to protect us from the customer or the customer from us. A few times today I really wanted to be able to jump over the counter to smarted people up. And of course they all smell like yesterdays alcohol. YUCK!!!!! I'm not saying I don't drink, but I definately don't have it oozing out of my pores two days later. And I can smell if through glass that is 3 inches thick. The only time I will smell that bad is when I am in Mexico. OOOOOHOOOOO. 2 weeks left, the count down is on.